As part of my continuing mission to educate my less sexually experienced readers, I'd like to present you this month with a position that only the most perverted of sluts will even consider doing, but which I feel may be of use to some of the less successful gentlemen out there.I'm speaking of course, of the ones that are so ugly and desperate that they have no alternative but to resort to using filthy street whores.
Now this position is a lot more complicated than last months and should only be attempted by gentlemen with the sufficient length. I recommend
a length of at least five inches as most women's buttocks are extremely large. If you are considering rutting a negroid female I would urge you only to attempt this with a length of at least seven inches as most women of this persuasion have arses like two dwarfs heads in a bag.
To rut a bitch in this position the male should kneel behind the suitably positioned female (as above) and place his erect bitch staff into the females slick sex pouch.
He must then proceed to agitate it in back and forth motion much the same as we learned in the missionary position.
While doing this it is considered polite to slap your bitch's arse cheeks and tell her what a dirty slut she is. Now this isn't set in stone and most filthy talk will suffice, but do try to avoid mentioning other women or indeed for our more filthier readers other men.
A lot of people ask me should I try to reach round and rub the females bitch bump, to this I can only say NO!!!!
If the woman you are rutting in this fashion cannot achieve satisfactory stimulation from a decent sized pole deep within her cunt muffin, then she is in all probability a slut and rubbing her bitch bump will only encourage her.
4 comments:
I dont get it, are you being serious or is this website a joke?
Joke? You may find the sexual arena funny sir, but I can assure you this site provides an invaluable service to our less worldly friends.
Now...if you said "worldly friends" I would assume this means that you would provide service to residents of this world. Now when you do say "less worldly friends" are you implying that you are talking to extraterrestrials that are indeed less worldly. This must mean that these extraterrestrials are in fact your friends too since you said this, so you have ET friends? What do they look like and can I meet and then smoke some bud with them? I am sure they would be cool with snorting several crushed pills of 100mg oxycontins too. It would be interesting to see what snorting oxy's and smoking some bud would do to an alien, do you agree? Cheers
Sir, I would strongly advise you to lay off the drugs and seek further psychological counseling.
Your obsession with imaginary beings seems to an unwelcome side effect of your massive drug use.
Try taking long walks or doing a jigsaw puzzle, I find these sorts of things tend to steer the mind away from its unhealthy craving for unusual medications.
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